To hear the voice of ECW, Joey Styles, caterwaul you’d think someone dropped a McDonalds coffee in his crotch, when in fact it was Shelly Martinez portraying Goth vixen Ariel who jumped into Joey’s undeserving lap and gave him the sort of dance usually reserved for celebrities and sports stars.

Most of us have to pay a two drink minimum and fork over $20 to get someone half as hot as Shelly to grind into our thighs. Styles gets it for free and spent the next six minutes complaining. Complaining that this (h/t babewarehouse) was gyrating on top of him. I don’t know what’s wrong with Styles but readers will agree there are worse things that could end up on your lap than her:

Like this for example:

(Is this a mugshot or publicity photo?)
Anyway, Desirelive’s been updated so be sure to stop by (click the top photo). Also, Shelly’s featured in Hot Rod Pinups, a hotrod pin-up book that fans will be sure to enjoy.

To be fair, there is one guy who agreed with Joey:

(R.I.P. Paul, we miss you, man.)